Friday, October 2, 2015

Options and choosing

This week at bycommonconsent there was a breezy satirical take on the not great Meridian article about helping kids choose heterosexuality. I will not link to the original article which has been taken down. (Though in the age of never being forgotten except in Europe, a quick Google search will find a cached version if you missed it.)

I don't often post comments to the many insightful things I read (mainly because I have so little time). After reading this humorous rebuttal to the Meridian piece, I really wanted to share my perspective though. You can read my full comments (Mike Smith) at the original site. But the gist of them is: as we support our LGBT brothers and sisters coming to terms with their sexuality, we need to help them keep all options on the table. We should not pressure or coerce them as they are making decisions about their life's path, but we can and should make sure that they have all the facts as they exercise their right to choose. And we should pray that Heavenly Father will help guide them to the path that's best for them.

If my son came to me and said he was gay, first and foremost I would tell him that I love him no matter what. I would make sure he knew that this "revelation" did not in any way change our relationship. (And for one of my children it wouldn't be such a revelation anyway.) But then I would remind him that in our push for more LGBT acceptance we often do not highlight enough the fact that sexuality is not binary and sometimes it's fluid, especially early on in our young lives. (Assuming my son is a teenager when he discloses his orientation, I would also remind him that he's dealing with a whole lot of new hormones which make it so pretty much anything that moves is going to turn him on... and many things that don't move as well. Ah, the joys of adolescence!) In the end I would remind him again that I love him no matter what.

And given all of the openly gay friends we invite regularly into our home, I hope he'll know it's true.