Sunday, June 21, 2015

Father's Day 2015

On this Father's Day 2015 I want to say how grateful I am that my life turned out the way it did. Looking back I see many possible pivot points where with a different choice I would not be married to an amazing woman with such a fantastic family. (I wouldn't be completely honest if I didn't admit that there are days when I wonder what life would have been like if I had found the man of my dreams and settled down with him, but those are only days in a life of months and years.) I am certain that even if I chose differently, life would have been both marvelous and mundane because... well... because that's life.

As a teenager I knew enough not to buy into the false dichotomy that many members of the church set up. "Either you stay in the church and become a Peter Priesthood with 5 fat babies and celestial potential or you leave the church for the gay lifestyle, cruising for easy sex with anonymous people, get AIDS, and die. Your choice." That's rubbish. In high school I crushed on this one guy who was both totally hot (though kind of short) and a really nice guy. I remember one night in a moment of clarity thinking, "I could totally live with this guy (or someone like him) just the two of us and be happy OR I could get married and have a family with my own kids and be happy." (At the time I was in high school having both wasn't an option. Gay marriage and adoption are definitely opening possibilities.)

I am not in any way advocating this life for others. (It is not easy.) I'm just saying nights when we sit around singing songs from Once or watching Marx brothers movies or telling jokes that might make the bishop blush (just a bit), these nights are pure gold.